Word Challenge Day 24 (Poem)

(I was away from my computer over the weekend, which is why I didn’t do days 21-23, but I’m glad to be back at it. Today’s prompt, “Write a note to the person that hurt you the most.”)

WORD CHALLENGE DAY 24: BECOMING

Almost 28 now
And I can hear your whispers
Feel your stares
“You’re not good enough,” you say
“Just give up—
You have failed, anyway,”
“You’re a let down,
You’re nobody,
You’re such an embarrassment!
You ought to be ashamed!”

And it is because of you
That I have hid my face
Clamoring for the shadows
Grasping for some sort of hiding place
Every time someone new approaches
I don’t trust anyone
In my mind you have planted the strong
—belief
That I have no friends
I have no talent,
“I don’t care what they say—
You’re a hack.”

Yet still,
I pick up a pen
And exercise my God given gift
To say

You will no longer run my life
You will not hold me back anymore

Most days
I hear the gun go off
Signaling for the start
And I feel your hands
Holding me down
Keeping me in place
And I can’t move

But not today

For too long I let you have your way
I cowered in fear of you as a child
But I boldly proclaim
Because of the Savior who lifts me up
That you won’t win—no, no
Not today, not anytime soon

God showed me
I AM a competitor
That it isn’t that I CAN’T do it
But simply that I won’t
Because I believed the lies you fed me
Over all these years
That I couldn’t

So now I’m here
Staring you down in the mirror
To your face
To say

You LIED

You told me no one loves me
No man would ever want me
That I’m ugly—I’m hideous
I’m too small, too light skin
Too weak
You made me believe
That every friend I had was an enemy
That my life was worthless
And twice before
Had me think life was not worth
Living
Said there was no point in me
Ever going to college
I was stupid, too dumb to ever make it
And I would never get accepted anyhow

You broke me…
But thank God for restoration
Because He repaired
Everything you destroyed in me
He replaced
All the hope you took
And now
When I look at you
All I can do is smile because

No matter what you,
Or anyone else comes whispering
Into my ears,
I now know
I’m better than any of those things
You said I was,
Still say I am
I am greater than all of those things

I am resilient
I am fearless
No, “Woman hear me roar,”
More like a warrior on the loose
With nothing left to lose
Because in Jesus
All I EVER do is win
I WIN
I’VE WON
You hurt me, yet you still lost

And I’d like to bet
You thought you had me bested
And I am sure
That I have yet to see you
Do your worst
But you know what?

The same can be said for me

You haven’t seen the last of me
Yes, I do bleed
And I cry
Even on days like today

But I still race
To break the tape
Because there’s a parade being held
In my honor
Just on the other side
Therefore I press towards the mark
I don’t care if I have to drag you
I’ll run so hard and so fiercely
That I’ll shake you off and leave you
—in the dust

I AM more than an overcomer
Because of He who overcame for us

You don’t scare me
Taunt me all you want, but
You don’t scare me at all
No more, no longer

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s