Previously in the series:
There were two main things that the Lord continuously stressed to me the entire summer:
Discipline and trust.
As I mentioned before in Part I, I came back thinking I had it all together, both as a staffer and a believer. In truth, I was a mess and in complete disarray.
I’ve to come recognize I tend to hit plateaus in my life when I become complacent. I reach a new height, but then I become comfortable there. I lose the desire to grow and decide that I don’t feel like pressing or working towards a new level in Christ. I lost interest in becoming a better me.
“I like where I am now; I think it suits me well. This is just fine, isn’t it?”
That’s how I was feeling until God snatched away my security blanket and placed me in situations where I would have to come out of my comfort zone.
I, of course, proceeded to fight Him every inch of the way.
I remember when I was kicked out of one of the morning bible studies because I got there late. There was a strict policy from the Soups: be prompt. If bible study starts at 6, you don’t stroll in through the door AT 6. The embarrassment I felt as I walked back out the door caused my pride to swell up, “Really? I wasn’t even that late! Just five minutes over! Fine. I won’t come to another one then.”
Coming from a community that was very lax, it sort of created an attitude of feeling free to do as one pleases. Although let me be clear: my church has order, and I’m thankful for having a church home where we have freedom in Christ. We don’t have to wait for someone to tell us if we’re good enough to do kingdom work; we just do it. The environment is such that we all have a part, not the pastor, to contribute our time, money, effort, etc.
However the drawback is that I lacked structure. Back home it didn’t matter what time you showed up. Long as you came it was fine; just don’t not go when you know you could have (i.e. being free that night but deciding not to go to bible study because you were “tired.”) These bible studies were at six o’clock in the MORNING. As in 6 A.M. To me, I was doing good enough by bothering to even get out of bed that early.
As I started to go into a full rant about how ridiculous it all was, the Lord began challenging me by putting things into perspective. If I had a job that required me to be up and there on time before 6 A.M., I would do it. If I had a mandatory class that met once a week at 6 A.M. and I needed in order to graduate, I would do it. He told me that I make what’s important to me a priority. Therefore if He was as important to me as I said He was, He should be a priority too.
A true servant and soldier for Christ is willing to improve every single day. Jesus isn’t lazy and we shouldn’t be lazy either.
So, I got over myself and began attending the women’s bible studies on Tuesday mornings. Eventually my boss, co-worker and I started going to bible study on Saturdays together. I remember not being to enthused about the Saturday ones because those were fairly slow days at the office; I enjoyed having time to myself.
Yet once I gave God more of my time and attention, I began learning so much. The Lord had been telling me for a long while that I didn’t know as much as I thought I did. It wasn’t until I started going to all those studies that something became very apparent to me:
When it came to my Word, I didn’t know diddlysquat.
As I began to develop that much needed discipline in my spiritual life, it spilled over into the natural as well.
Trust me, I was a piece of work then and I still am now. The only difference is that I’m much better off than where I was before.
When God asked me to do some seemingly crazy or uncomfortable task, my responses used to be, “Do I really have to do that?” “Okay… Later,” and the standard, “I’ll pretend like I didn’t hear Him and just wait for Jesus to ask someone else.”
Now there were, “Um… O-okay, Lord,” and gradually, “Lord, if it’s Your will, I’ll do it. I trust You.”
By keeping up those good habits and practices I was taught at kamp I continuously discover something new each time. I constantly have to get out of my feelings, but I see now that Jesus IS Lord. That has become more than just words; it’s REAL to me.
And when He says that nothing is impossible for Him, He wasn’t saying that just because it sounds nice. He means it.
Christ came through for me so many times while at kamp:
I didn’t know how I was going to get home after He had me spend most of my check to buy copies of my book to sell. Not too long after that He blessed me with a plane ticket.
I wasn’t sure if the book would sell. I ended up selling 15 out of the 20 copies and I made my money back plus a profit.
I didn’t think anyone would receive the poems I read each week, but every time I had at least one person tell me that they were ministered to.
Discipline and trust in God requires us to submit and believe that it’s already done, even when you can’t see the results right away. That’s not easy to do, but it can change your mindset for the better.
Now, I don’t really have to see the results to know that God is able because that’s not real faith. REAL FAITH is knowing that even when the outcome doesn’t appear to be in your favor you know it’s always going to turn out for your good anyway.
Jacqueline simone media 
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